Friday, June 29, 2018

Chữa bài writing 2


The given line chart gives information about the proportion of women members in parliament in many European nations between 2000 and 2012.

Overall, it is noticeable that there was an upward trend in the shares of female members working in parliament in Germany, Italy, France and UK, while only the figures for Belgium tend to decrease throughout given 12 years.
In 2000, the number of women taking part in parliament in Germany reached the peak, at 33%. This was followed by the figures for Italy, France, at 27% and 25% respectively. Moreover, the rate of females people in parliament was a half of the percentage of females in parliament in Germany with 17%. And the rate of female members of parliament in UK was the lowest, at 3%. Especially, both the proportions of women working in parliament in Germany and France experienced a gradual growth, to 39% and 32% respectively during over period shown.
Besides, 2008 was witnessed a steady rise in the rates of females of parliament in Italy and Belgium, to 32% and 29% respectively, but then there were a dramatic change in both. There was a significant jump in the figure for Italy, to 39%, whereas the share of women of parliament in Belgium went down gradually, to 23% in 2012. In stark contrast, a sharp climb was observed in the proportion of females in parliament to 23% in UK between 2000 and 2012.
In conclusion, the rate of woment working parliament in Italy was the highest as well as nearly double than the frequency both Belgium and UK in 2012.
Comment
between 2000 and 2012= throughout the given 12 years= during (over) the period shown=In|During the period from 2000 to 2012=In|During the period betweet 2000 and 2012=Over the period from 2000 to 2012= over a period of 12 years
in 2012= by 2012= 2012 was observed/witnessed
In stark contrast, however | Conversely

Take part in parliament = attend/participate in/engage in Parliament= parliamentarians= participants in Parliament
UK (adjective), the UK (noun)
the rate/proportion/share/percentage of females/women in Parliament (in the UK)= the rate of females as parliamentarians= the rate of female parliamentarians= the rate of females participating in Parliament=the rate of female participants in Parliament = the rate of female members in Parliament
The given line chart gives information about the proportion of women members in parliament in many European nations between 2000 and 2012.
= The given line chart provides\describes\illustrates\depicts information about the proportion of women members in parliaments in certain European nations between 2000 and 2012.
Overall, it is noticeable that there was an upward trend in the shares of female members working in parliament in Germany, Italy, France and UK, while only the figures for Belgium tend to decrease throughout given 12 years.
= Overall, it is noticeable that there was an upward trend in the shares of female members in Parliaments in Germany, Italy, France and the UK, while only the figures for Parliament of Belgium tended to decrease throughout the given 12 years.
In 2000, the number of women taking part in parliament in Germany reached the peak, at 33%. This was followed by the figures for Italy, France, at 27% and 25% respectively.
= In 2000, the percentage of women participating in Parliament in Germany reached the peak, at 33%, followed by the figures of Italy and France, at 27% and 25% respectively.

Moreover, the rate of females people in parliament was a half of the percentage of females in parliament in Germany with 17%. And the rate of female members of parliament in UK was the lowest, at 3%.
= Moreover, the rate of female participants in parliament (in country) equals a half of the percentage of women in Parliament in Germany with 17%. And the rate of female members of parliament in the UK was the lowest of 3%.
Especially, both the proportions of women working in parliament in Germany and France experienced a gradual growth, to 39% and 32% respectively during over period shown.
= Especially, both Germany and France experienced a gradual growth in the percentages of female parliamentarians, to 39% and 32% respectively during the period from 2002 to 2012.
Besides, 2008 was witnessed a steady rise in the rates of females of parliament in Italy and Belgium, to 32% and 29% respectively, but then there were a dramatic change in both.
= Besides, 2008 was witnessed a steady rise in the rates of females engaging in Parliaments in Italy and Belgium, to 32% and 29% respectively, but then these numbers suffered from a dramatic decrease by 2012. (hạn chế dùng to be)
There was a significant jump in the figure for Italy, to 39%, whereas the share of women of parliament in Belgium went down gradually, to 23% in 2012. In stark contrast, a sharp climb was observed in the proportion of females in parliament to 23% in UK between 2000 and 2012.
= There was also a significant jump in the figures for Italy, to 39%, whereas the share of women of parliament in Belgium went down slightly to 23% in 2012. In stark contrast, however, a sharp climb was observed in the proportion of females in parliament to 23% in the UK between 2000 and 2012.

In conclusion, the rate of woment working parliament in Italy was the highest as well as nearly double than the frequency both Belgium and UK in 2012.
= In conclusion, the rate of women participants in Parliament in Italy stayed the highest and nearly doubled than the numbers of both Belgium and the UK by 2012.
(double vừa lad adj, verb, noun)



No comments:

Post a Comment